The REAL Jesusland

Still just a sparrow in His hand

2011-03-09T07:36:00.000-08:00

My family had been facing a serious financial crunch coming up thanks to Obamacare. Our medical insurance rates were going up significantly at the end of this month, to the point where it probably wouldn't be affordable to us anymore. (FYI, we had to get insurance independently because my wife's new job doesn't offer insurance themselves, opting to pay employees more so they can buy their preferred insurance.) This potential crisis had been weighing heavily on our hearts and minds for a while and it was something we had been praying about. Well, God just answered those prayers. In fact, one could argue that he had already answered those prayers when I got my job back in December! I became eligible for insurance under my employer during this past month and we applied just yesterday. The plan fits our needs and is less than half as expensive as what our previous insurance would be starting next month. God is truly awesome!

Are not two sparrows sold for a penny?

Yet not one of them will fall to the ground
apart from the will of your Father.

And even the very hairs of your head are all numbered.

So don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.

--Matthew 10:29-31

God DOES answer prayers

2010-11-29T12:53:00.000-08:00

My family and I moved to another city (because we wanted to so we could be closer to family) a couple months ago. I had been out of a job since that time. Recently, I was advancing through the job hunting process for selling mobile devices at Target and was up to the background check and drug screen level. It was an okay-sounding job, but it didn't really feel right. After a glitch with them sending me the drug screen paperwork via email (they tried to send it twice and had the right email address both times, but it never got to me and it never bounced back to them -- the email just vanished), I began to wonder if there was something more at work, so I prayed. I prayed to God that He would make it clearer to me if this job wasn't right for me and SPECIFICALLY for Him to place another, better-fitting job that I had applied for in my path. I got my answer to that specific prayer when I got offered that very job today! God is absolutely awesome and anyone who says He doesn't answer prayers -- SPECIFIC prayers -- is a fool.

Compare and contrast

2009-08-26T12:23:00.001-07:00

Two views of our little world and humanity.

Carl Sagan (an agnostic at best): "Who are we? We find that we live on an insignificant planet of a humdrum star lost in a galaxy tucked away in some forgotten corner of a universe in which there are far more galaxies than people."

Jesus Christ: "For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life."

I'm sure you non-Christians reading this will understand me taking the latter over the former.

What I am

2009-06-25T14:27:00.000-07:00

I am not what I ought to be — ah, how imperfect and deficient! I am not what I wish to be — I abhor what is evil, and I would cleave to what is good! I am not what I hope to be — soon, soon shall I put off mortality, and with mortality all sin and imperfection. Yet, though I am not what I ought to be, nor what I wish to be, nor what I hope to be, I can truly say, I am not what I once was; a slave to sin and Satan; and I can heartily join with the apostle, and acknowledge, "By the grace of God I am what I am."
--John Newton (1725 - 1807)

Ephesians 5 - Wives and husbands; submission and sacrifice

2009-04-09T19:32:00.000-07:00

A discussion on the IMDB forum for the movie Fireproof inspired me to share this.

What does "submit" actually mean? Briefly, it means to yield authority. Is that really such a bad thing?

Now let's look at what the Bible says about wives in Ephesians 5 (the text that's at the center of all this business):

"Wives, submit to your husbands as to the Lord. For the husband is the head of the wife as Christ is the head of the church, his body, of which he is the Savior. Now as the church submits to Christ, so also wives should submit to their husbands in everything."

Three sentences. That's it. That's what all the fuss is about. Three measly little sentences. The way the Christian-bashers talk, you'd think there was a whole book of the Bible devoted to putting wives in their place.

Okay, so now what about husbands?

"Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her to make her holy, cleansing her by the washing with water through the word, and to present her to himself as a radiant church, without stain or wrinkle or any other blemish, but holy and blameless. In this same way, husbands ought to love their wives as their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself. After all, no one ever hated his own body, but he feeds and cares for it, just as Christ does the church— for we are members of his body. "For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh." This is a profound mystery—but I am talking about Christ and the church. However, each one of you also must love his wife as he loves himself, and the wife must respect her husband."

Holy cow! That's quite a lot more, isn't it? And look what's expected of the husbands: they are to love their wives the way Christ loved the church. CHRIST SACRIFICED EVERYTHING INCLUDING HIS LIFE FOR THE CHURCH! This means that husbands are to sacrifice as much as they can - up to and including their very lives - for their wives.

So tell me, who has the better deal: wives, who merely have to submit authority to their husbands, or husbands, who have to sacrifice everything for their wives? (I'll give you a hint: it's a trick question and the answer probably isn't as obvious as you might think.)

A Christian to the bone

2009-03-19T07:04:00.000-07:00

This story made my day.

One of my favorites: "My Hope Is In The Lord"

2009-03-12T10:43:00.001-07:00

I need to learn to wait better

2009-03-06T10:38:00.001-08:00

"I am so smart! S-M-R-T. I mean, S-M-A-R-T."

2009-02-09T11:30:00.001-08:00

A God of no coincidences

2008-11-26T14:31:00.000-08:00

This past Wednesday, our third child Eric was born. We were planning on delivering him via C-section on Thursday, but my wife went into labor Tuesday night at 11:30, so the operation got moved up a day. Now, my work schedule at the group home I work at usually has me working Thursday afternoon, through the overnight (sleeping) and until 9 a.m. on Friday. However, I had switched shifts with others weeks in advance so I could have all those hours off. One of the switches had me working Tuesday as my overnight. The Sunday before, though, the person doing that overnight called and said she was very sick and needed to switch. We ended up swapping that night with the Tuesday night. It didn't even dawn on my until this past Sunday when my wife mentioned it that had I not switched those two overnights, I would not have been home when she went into labor (and it probably wouldn't have been too easy trying to find someone to come in for me). God truly was watching out for us.

Different

2008-11-17T14:30:00.000-08:00

I have had the right
To stand and fight
But it would have still been wrong
I've had the chance to prove
A hurtful truth
I had to let it go and just move on

'Cause there's a gift called grace
That's captured my life
Though the way of the world is power and pride

I want to be different, Jesus
Just like You
I want to be tender with mercy
Guiding all I do
So when others talk about me
Let it be because
I am different
Let the difference be love

Let me have the kind
Of heart that shines
The light and shows you're real
And where hope is dim
And fear sets in
Will you use me Lord to help and heal

I don't want wealth or fame
To define the life I live
Oh let me be known
For what I give

I want to be different, Jesus
Just like You
I want to be tender with mercy
Guiding all I do
So when others talk about me
Let it be because
I am different
Let the difference be love

Every day is a chance to serve You
By caring for someone else
I will make the choice to surrender
And not live for myself

I want to be different, Jesus
Just like You
I want to be tender with mercy
Guiding all I do
So when others talk about me
Let it be because
I am different
Let the difference be love

Mollye Rees - Different

Just an awesome, awesome passage

2008-11-14T12:50:00.000-08:00

My Mom helped introduce me (and our church's adult Bible study) to these verses. They're just so beautiful!

Though the fig tree does not bud
and there are no grapes on the vines,
though the olive crop fails
and the fields produce no food,
though there are no sheep in the pen
and no cattle in the stalls,
yet I will rejoice in the LORD,
I will be joyful in God my Savior.

Habakkuk 3:17-18

"While I'm Waiting" music video from Fireproof

2008-10-13T10:51:00.001-07:00

God's perfect timing

2008-10-07T10:28:00.000-07:00

We got some sad news yesterday. Our sponsorship of a child in India through Mission of Mercy came to an end. It's sad, but these things happen. Hopefully the last 9 years have made a huge impact on him and his faith. I look forward to meeting him in person someday (most likely in Heaven).

I don't remember if I ever mentioned it before, but at a Christian concert almost exactly 9 years ago, we signed up to sponsor a child through Mission of Mercy. This was while we were still mourning after my wife miscarried our first child on July 25, 1999. At that time, we were given an envelope at random with the child's photo and information inside. As we started reading through it, we were surprised and stunned at his date of birth.

It was July 25.

I still get a little choked up at that. You cannot tell me that was just some bizarre coincidence. I don't believe in coincidences because with God, there are no coincidences. We were MEANT to go to that concert. We were MEANT to be moved to sponsor a child. We were MEANT to walk up to the Mission of Mercy booth at the moment we did. We were MEANT to be helped by the person who greeted us. We were MEANT to receive the envelope the worker chose at random. We were MEANT to be the sponsors of a child whose date of birth was July 25. There is simply NO question about it.

Incidentally, also in the last 9 years, July 25 has become important to us for two other major reasons: it was the date my mother-in-law remarried and it was also the date my wife's estranged brother reconciled with her family. Again, these were not coincidences.

Anyway, that all brings us to now. Mission of Mercy sent us a letter about the situation and asked us if we were willing to wait for them to find a new sponsor child for us. After discussing it, my wife and I felt that this was God's way of telling us, "You've done enough. The seed has been sown and is growing well. It's time to move on." We have a baby boy coming next month and it will be a great help to have that money freed up to pay for his needs. In addition to all that, our pledge to help pay for our church's new parking lot is finally coming to an end. I think the pledge was for three years. That will free up more money for the baby. Any extra money we have will be donated to missions and charities based out of our church.

It's sad that our sponsorship has come to an end, but it came at exactly the right time. Just as God takes care of the sparrows, he takes care of His children. He knows what their needs are and when and how to meet them. I am very thankful and very humbled to be held in the safety of His loving hands.

The Passover and the omniscience of God

2008-09-22T14:25:00.000-07:00

We recently had a special program at our church in which a guest speaker, Richard Freeman, went through and explained the Passover meal that Jesus and his disciples would have shared before he was crucified. Out of everything Richard taught us, the one thing that stuck with me was what he said about the original Passover in Egypt during the time of Moses. To mark their doors, the Hebrews used the blood of a lamb without imperfection. They took a stalk of hyssop, dipped it into a container holding the blood at the foot of the door, marked the top of the doorframe, then marked each side.

Think about that for a moment. Think about the motions they made.

Bottom to top. Side to side.

They were making the sign of the cross in the blood of a perfect sacrificial lamb! They did so at the instruction of the God who sees through time and saw Jesus perfect sacrifice on the cross hundreds and hundreds of years later.

Just so you know

2008-07-21T19:22:00.001-07:00

This isn't a debate blog. I'm not here to argue ad nauseum with atheists who have large chips on their shoulders. (And no, bringing it to my other blog won't do any good either.) This blog is about my spiritual journey and not about your personal distaste for my faith. I may publish and respond to comments if I see good reason, but most of the time I will not. Heck, I don't even check very often to see if anyone has left comments.

Take a guess

2008-06-30T07:57:00.000-07:00

"Koia ano te aroha o te Atua ki te ao,
homai ana e ia tana Tama kotahi,
kia kahore ai e ngaro te tangata e whakapono ana ki a ia,
engari kia whiwhi ai ki te ora tonu."

(Here's a hint.)

Fearfully and wonderfully made

2008-05-01T10:40:00.000-07:00

This protein has been in our bodies since before Christ died on the cross. It was there when Adam and Eve were created. The sign of the cross was put in our bodies from the very beginning by the Almighty God who sees beyond time!

And notice how it's constructed. Three chains intertwined as one molecule. Think about that for a minute.

Father.

Son.

Holy Spirit.

Coincidence? I don't think so! God is truly sovereign over all!

"He is the image of the invisible God, the firstborn over all creation. For by him all things were created: things in heaven and on earth, visible and invisible, whether thrones or powers or rulers or authorities; all things were created by him and for him. He is before all things, and in him all things hold together." (Colossians 1:15-17)

Jesus and other savior figures

2008-04-23T07:17:00.000-07:00

I've seen it probably dozens of times. Skeptics argue that Jesus is no different than the many, many savior figures of various religions throughout history. Alright, fine. Then why did only Christianity thrive while the others died out?

The fact is that Christ is different. His deeds and teachings were completely different from any other savior figure. And above all, he died to forgive our sins and rose from the grave to give us life everlasting. THAT is why Christianity survived and flourished.

"Beautiful Healer" lyrics

2008-03-19T18:36:00.001-07:00

This is a song that we sing in church. I believe our pastor's daughter (who plays it beautifully on the piano) said it was written for a college choir. I can't find any other mention of it online, which is unfortunate because it's a really moving song.

Broken I've fallen again
Lost in the habits of my sin
And Jesus I have nowhere else to go
I'm asking for the love that You show

[Chorus]
Beautiful Healer restore this heart
Masterful Savior replace broken parts of me
Merciful Provider lead me by Your hand
Wonderful Creator with You I will stand
As You make my life anew
I am fully dependent on You

Helpless and unfaithful I bow
Jesus come and be with me now
Reveal in me the glory of Your name
So I don't run an leave this place the same

[Chorus 2X]

As You make my life anew
I am fully dependent on You

The Case for Christ

2007-11-27T09:23:00.001-08:00

Lee Strobel's "the Case for Christ" in eight parts. Part 1:

Find the rest via the "More From: mryer777" and "Related Videos" boxes.

Christians and health insurance

2007-10-19T14:24:00.000-07:00

Back here, Eugene asked (in a long, rambling fashion) why I or any other Christian would need health insurance. He then went on to take several verses out of context to "prove" that health insurance is unbiblical and that owning insurance proves that Christians actually know God is imaginary.

To this, there is but one simple reply: did Joseph think God was imaginary when he commanded Egypt to store up food during the seven years of plenty to prepare for the coming seven years of famine? Making provision for the future is not unbiblical nor is it proof that Christians secretly think God isn't real.

Look at it this way: if one is going to misuse those verses to prove that Christians shouldn't have health insurance, then why not also use them to prove that Christians shouldn't work, exercise, eat healthy, or even eat at all? Maybe all those things unbiblical, too, and doing them proves that Christians don't really think God is real.

Do you now see how ridiculous and foolish that skeptical line of thinking is?

On brains

2007-09-15T10:22:00.000-07:00

[In response to an anonymous troll who left a comment.]

I have enough brains to question both God and evolution.

Previously: On Faith

Awesome skit

2007-09-09T19:02:00.000-07:00

Watch it all the way through. It's definitely worth it.

My son's first Bible

2007-09-09T11:43:00.000-07:00

In church today, my son - who just entered first grade - was presented with his first Bible. (All first graders in our school are presented with Bibles at the beginning of the year's Sunday School.) When the pastor called his name to come forward, my son leapt up from his seat with his arms in the air and a huge smile on his face, and ran up to the front of the church to collect his prize. What a great moment! It's one of those moments you wish were caught on video tape.

At home, after lunch, I took him aside and showed him some Bible verses that I knew he'd like. They are some of my favorites. The first was Proverbs 18:10:

The name of the LORD is a strong tower;
the righteous run to it and are safe.

Then Psalm 61:3

For you have been my refuge,
a strong tower against the foe.

Ephesians 3:16-19:

I pray that out of his glorious riches he may strengthen you with power through his Spirit in your inner being, so that Christ may dwell in your hearts through faith. And I pray that you, being rooted and established in love, may have power, together with all the saints, to grasp how wide and long and high and deep is the love of Christ, and to know this love that surpasses knowledge—that you may be filled to the measure of all the fullness of God.

And Ephesians 6:10-18:

Finally, be strong in the Lord and in his mighty power. Put on the full armor of God so that you can take your stand against the devil's schemes. For our struggle is not against flesh and blood, but against the rulers, against the authorities, against the powers of this dark world and against the spiritual forces of evil in the heavenly realms. Therefore put on the full armor of God, so that when the day of evil comes, you may be able to stand your ground, and after you have done everything, to stand. Stand firm then, with the belt of truth buckled around your waist, with the breastplate of righteousness in place, and with your feet fitted with the readiness that comes from the gospel of peace. In addition to all this, take up the shield of faith, with which you can extinguish all the flaming arrows of the evil one. Take the helmet of salvation and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God. And pray in the Spirit on all occasions with all kinds of prayers and requests. With this in mind, be alert and always keep on praying for all the saints.

He thought they were pretty cool. He got a particular kick out of learning that the Bible - the word of God - is a sword (and I taught him the difference between it and a metal sword).

Richard Kiel: actor, James Bond villian, ex-alcoholic, Christian

2007-04-06T07:49:00.000-07:00

Richard "Jaws" Kiel has a pretty cool testimony here.

Forgiveness

2007-03-28T13:06:00.000-07:00

Dawn's got a great post about forgiveness regarding past sins. It seems that she has received opposition to her decision to be chaste even from people who support chastity because of her past. What a pity that is. Dawn's made some major changes in her life and the Lord has forgiven her of her past. Why can't people also do the same? If people who've changed can't speak out against the things they've rejected, then a lot of people in the world need to shut up.

WHY am I a Christian?

2006-07-07T20:24:00.000-07:00

I recently saw a comment from someone on another blog that they "tried to go Christian" in order to please their family. They failed, of course, on both accounts (being a Christian - or so they thought - and pleasing their family). This person also made the comment that based on my posts here, that's the same reason I'm a Christian. I'm not exactly sure where this person is getting that idea from. I can say that some members of my family have greatly influenced me in my Christian walk. I look up to my mother and brother a lot. However, I am not a Christian to please them or anyone else. That's shallow, wrong-headed and definitely not biblical. I'm not a Christian to please my wife, mom, brother, pastor, or any other person on earth. I only want to please and glorify God. That is why I am a Christian and it is the only reason anyone else should be one, too. If you're trying to "go Christian" to please someone other than God, you're not go to succeed. It is a false "faith" that attempts to glorify yourself. It is offensive to God and you won't please Him or anyone else in the long run.

He is risen! Alleluia!

2006-04-16T08:16:00.000-07:00

Christ the Lord is risen today, Alleluia!
Earth and heaven in chorus say, Alleluia!
Raise your joys and triumphs high, Alleluia!
Sing, ye heavens, and earth reply, Alleluia!

Love's redeeming work is done, Alleluia!
Fought the fight, the battle won, Alleluia!
Death in vain forbids him rise, Alleluia!
Christ has opened paradise, Alleluia!

Lives again our glorious King, Alleluia!
Where, O death, is now thy sting? Alleluia!
Once he died our souls to save, Alleluia!
Where's thy victory, boasting grave? Alleluia!

Soar we now where Christ has led, Alleluia!
Following our exalted Head, Alleluia!
Made like him, like him we rise, Alleluia!
Ours the cross, the grave, the skies, Alleluia!

Hail the Lord of earth and heaven, Alleluia!
Praise to thee by both be given, Alleluia!
Thee we greet triumphant now, Alleluia!
Hail the Resurrection, thou, Alleluia!

King of glory, soul of bliss, Alleluia!
Everlasting life is this, Alleluia!
Thee to know, thy power to prove, Alleluia!
Thus to sing, and thus to love, Alleluia!

Jesus sand sculptures - Awesome!

2006-03-31T09:14:00.000-08:00

These are so beautiful!

The man I am and the man I used to be

2006-03-08T17:53:00.000-08:00

[Sorry this took a while. Shortly after updating the previous post, we gave up the computer for a while and I didn't remember to come back to this after we got it back.]

Someone came to me with a question a while ago:

"How does one go from being a liberal to being the complete polar opposite?"

The answer to that question is going to take a bit to answer. Might as well start from the beginning.

I was born into a Christian family. Both my parents were devoted Christians who made sure their kids went to church. They changed church affiliations a few times in their lives due to problems with doctrinal issues. Eventually they settled in a Baptist church - the one I am a full-fledged member of now, in fact. I attended this church and their Wednesday night youth groups for a while before graduating from high school. But even during that time, the foundations for my life apart from God and the conservative values that I was raised on were being built.

In high school (the late 1980s), I was first introduced to and became friends with people who were atheists. Their influence on me was subtle, but effective. I eventually came to doubt and then reject my belief in God. Along with that went all the conservative values I had. I came to accept evolution as fact, and see things like abortion as "a woman's right" and homosexuality as "harmless" and "normal." Additionally, my view of conservatives and Christians became quite negative. A lot of the statements I see made against them now were statements I would've made and probably did make during that time.

During this time, I first formulated my political standings. I voted for Bill Clinton twice and ridiculed people like Rush Limbaugh. I supported the modern atheist idea of what "separation of church and state" means (i.e. "keep it in your homes and churches where it belongs") and opposed things like Ten Commandments monuments and publicly-funded memorial crosses.

I also became addicted to pornography during this time. I will admit that. I bought many magazines and videos. It's something I am now deeply ashamed of and it still affects me. It's like a drug or alcohol addiction. I got a "high" from it and that has been difficult to shake completely.

This all lasted for most of the '90s. During this time, I witnessed what I now know in retrospect was God's hand at work in my life and the lives on my family. My dad got very sick and was brought to the local hospital, then transfered down to a larger and better equipped hospital in the Twin Cities many miles away. The diagnosis was cancer. He spent many months in that hospital and needed major surgery to remove a large portion of his digestive tract including much of his stomach. It was a very, very difficult time for my mother and after returning home from the hospital one day, she broke down right in front of me and cried hysterically. I didn't have the slightest clue what to do. I tried to comfort and console her, but I didn't know how. Emotionally (and I know now spiritually, too) I was lost. Right then - and I mean right then my older brother, who lives down in the Cities, arrived. My brother is a very faithful Christian and he was able to calm her and reassure her while I stood by feeling quite helpless. That event has stayed with me a long time. Looking back, I now find it impossible to accept that his arrival right at that time was a coincidence.

My dad eventually got better and was able to return home. He returned to work and retired not long after. He was the director of a company that did lots of social work in the community and county. It was work he did very well and of which he was very proud. I'm sure he felt he was doing the Lord's work.

The relief we felt at his recovery didn't last long, though. He ended up having a serious relapse of his cancer. He decided not to fight it this time. The last battle just took too much out of him - literally and figuratively. He didn't make this decision lightly. It wasn't, "I'm giving up." It was, "I'm being called home."

So, with the help of the local Hospice program, he was able to live out his last days at home. It was a slow process. He lost more and more weight as the days passed. It should've been very painful for him, but through what only could have been the grace of God, he did not suffer much. He only took about half of the dosage of pain medication he was prescribed.

My dad had a deep faith in Christ and it shined like never before during his final days. He never faltered in that faith, though he had every reason to do so. He knew that in Christ, his sins were forgiven and a new life free of pain and sadness awaited him.

Early one February morning, as he lay near death and in a coma, my mom went to moisten his dry lips. When she had finished, he smiled and was gone. I don't doubt that it was no coincidence that he died at that moment. My mom was always by his side during their marriage, during his illnesses, and it fit that she would be right at his side when he died. He could've died while she was resting or off in another room, but no. God called him home at the right time.

His memorial service drew hundreds of people from all over. The church was packed to capacity and thensome! It was simply one of the most amazing things I have ever witnessed in my life. I felt like I was at some famous celebrity's or world leader's memorial service. Here was my father, a man who just was this regular joe, or seemed to be, and his death resulted is this immense outpouring from people. I was the first of his children to speak at the memorial and my first word was simply, "Wow." It's a memory I still marvel at.

So why did this happen? Why did so many people - some from very far away - come to pay their final respects to my dad? What made him so special? The answer was obvious. He was greatly loved because he loved greatly. He respected people and treated them with kindness and never really lost his temper. In my heart and mind, my dad epitomized 1 John 4:7-21:

Dear friends, let us love one another, for love comes from God. Everyone who loves has been born of God and knows God. Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love. This is how God showed his love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through him. This is love: not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as an atoning sacrifice for our sins. Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another. No one has ever seen God; but if we love one another, God lives in us and his love is made complete in us.

We know that we live in him and he in us, because he has given us of his Spirit. And we have seen and testify that the Father has sent his Son to be the Savior of the world. If anyone acknowledges that Jesus is the Son of God, God lives in him and he in God. And so we know and rely on the love God has for us.

God is love. Whoever lives in love lives in God, and God in him. In this way, love is made complete among us so that we will have confidence on the day of judgment, because in this world we are like him. There is no fear in love. But perfect love drives out fear, because fear has to do with punishment. The one who fears is not made perfect in love.

We love because he first loved us. If anyone says, "I love God," yet hates his brother, he is a liar. For anyone who does not love his brother, whom he has seen, cannot love God, whom he has not seen. And he has given us this command: Whoever loves God must also love his brother.

Although I didn't realize it at the time, all of this started to change me. I started becoming more open to the Gospel. I started reading more and more apologetical writings and seeing the logic and truths they contained. I found that everything that I had learned about the Bible being full of contradictions and errors was wrong and based on misconceptions, half-truths and outright lies. I rededicated my life to the Lord, began going to church again and eventually decided to get baptized. By that time, my entire worldview had changed radically to a conservative view. I now think - among other things - that abortion is murder and homosexuality is a sin. More importantly - MOST importantly! - I've seen God's hand at work in my life not only now, but in the past as well. I realized that even when I rejected Him, He never left me.

So who am I now? I am a man who loves God. Contrary to what some would have you believe, that does not make me hateful, bigotted, prejudiced, homophobic, "holier-than-thou," or any other negative condemnation that is typically leveled at conservative Christians simply because they are conservative Christians. I have opinions and am not afraid to call a spade a spade. I am not perfect and I have faults like everyone else. I will not deny that. I admit that I often can be impulsive, cynical and sarcastic, but these are not borne out of hatred. I'm trying to soften my personality through prayer, practice and thinking about things more before I say or write them. I'm sure it will be a lifelong process and I will face many trials, but I trust that the Lord will give me the strength to get through it all. At my Dad's memorial, we chose to have a friend sing "the Anchor Holds." The song just epitomizes my Dad's life. Through joy and suffering, his faith in and his love for Jesus held as firm as an anchor. His life brought glory to God and I want my life to do the same.

Finally, here is my life verse again:

At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life."

--Titus 3:3-7

Coming soon: my journey from Christian upbringing, to atheist, to Christian

2005-11-11T08:07:00.000-08:00

I'm in the process of typing it up right now. I'm thinking about what I want to write, writing everything I want to write, but also trying to avoid being too verbose and rambling. Watch for it.

UPDATE: Still working on it. I didn't realize how much I would write.

Promise Keepers in one word

2005-09-12T21:33:00.000-07:00

TRANSFORMING!!!

I had an absolute blast! God blessed that gathering and used it to affect me personally. He exposed by shortcomings as a Christian, a husband and a father, broke me to the point of wracking sobs, then lifted me up and filled me with His Spirit. Several hundred men also either gave their lives to the Lord for the first time or, like me, deepened their relationship with Him. The music was fantastic! Trust me, if you've never experienced thousands of men singing their hearts out to God, you just don't know what you're missing. All those voices just move through you physically, emotionally and spiritually. I really believe I got a taste of what Heaven is like (and, ultimately, what the new Heaven and Earth will be like) with all those countless voices singing praises to the King of Kings.

On faith

2005-07-21T21:57:00.000-07:00

I have enough faith to question God.

But I don't have enough faith to not question evolution.

I just about lost it in church today

2005-04-17T12:01:00.000-07:00

We learned in church today that late last week, one of the teens from our church was playing baseball and got hit in the chest by a fastball when he tried to bunt. He made it to first base, but immediately collapsed. The hit had stopped his heart. A nurse in the stands ran out and was able to get his heart and breathing started via CPR. He was rushed to a hospital about 100-120 miles away where he was put under the care of the specialist. He's doing fine with some bruising on his heart. The word from the specialist is that this sort of injury has somehwere around a 90% fatality rate.

After this announcement and prayer, we started our worship service with hymns that people had requested a couple weeks ago. The first song was "Family of God." While we were singing the first verse, I got hit hard by the lyrics and had to fight back tears while my voice faltered and ultimately choked:

You will notice we say "brother and sister" 'round here,
It's because we're a family and these are so near;
When one has a heartache, we all share the tears,
And rejoice in each victory in this family so dear.

Even now, I'm tearing up. The choice and placement of this song was made days before the accident happened. I cannot but know that God's hand was at work here. What a powerful and comforting message! Praise God!

Sorry for the silence

2005-02-22T21:41:00.000-08:00

It's just that my faith is a very personal thing and it's often difficult to put it into words.

China continues to persecute Christians

2004-12-14T14:16:00.000-08:00

I received this in my email today courtesy of the American Family Association and the Voice of the Martyrs:

When 34-year old Jiang Zongxiu went to her neighboring market last June in Guizhou Province, China. Along with her mother-in-law, Jiang went through the marketplace, taking opportunities to hand out Bibles and Christian literature and telling people about Jesus. Only this day they had an encounter with the Chinese police.

The two Christian women were handcuffed together and brought to the police station. They were interrogated throughout the evening of the 17th. The next morning they were sentenced by the Public Security Bureau (PSB) to 15 days incarceration for “suspected spreading of rumor and disturbing the social order.”

Jiang and her mother-in-law knew the risk of spreading Christian literature in communist China. Both had been active in their church for more than 10 years and dared to go forth. Even when they were arrested, interrogated and sentenced to serve 15 days, they were willing to accept the consequences of their actions—all from a government that claims to have “freedom of religion.”

But it was not enough for the PSB to arrest and beat these two Christian women for the crime of passing our Christian literature. In the afternoon of June 18th, Mrs. Jiang Zongziu was pronounced dead by the PSB office of Tongzi County. They claimed she died of “natural causes.” The fact is she was beaten to death.

The Voice of the Martyrs has received video testimony from the surviving family, photos of Jiang body showing her bruised body, and a copy of the actual arrest document. All of this had to be smuggled out of China as the authorities continue to attempt to hide their systematic persecution of Christians. An international campaign is now under way on behalf of the surviving family.

It's sickening that Christians are being subjected to such brutality, and it's upsetting that the world doesn't take more notice. Please pray for the persecuted Christian in China and throughout the world.

Wise words from a wise woman

2004-12-09T20:14:00.000-08:00

If there is anything in my long life [that I've learned it] is that God never takes anything or changes anything without giving something even better. A closer walk with Him is the greatest blessing of my life and whatever happens in this life He has promised to never leave us or forsake us in our time of need or our time of prosperity. The greatest blessing of His is life. He created us. Because of His love He gave His only Son that our sinfulness would not separate us from Him. We can have a talk with Him whenever as we can be assured He hears our heartfelt thoughts and conceerns. The closer we walk with Him the more lcontent we become. Believers are in the palm of His hand. No other belief or religion offers that wonderful blessing. All they can offer is only constant trying to be good to earn their God's favor. Our Savior did it all and we can celebrate His birth with joy, but I have found that I celebrate His death and resurrection even more!!!!!! Hallelujah!!!!!

For the mother of my children, her mom, my mom, and all moms

2004-11-29T14:55:00.000-08:00

The child asked God,
“They tell me you are sending me to earth tomorrow, but
how am I going to live there being so small and helpless?”

“Your angel will be waiting for you and will take care of you.”

The child further inquired,
“But tell me, here in heaven I don't have to
do anything but sing and smile to be happy.”

God said,
“Your angel will sing for you and will also smile for you
and you will feel your angel's love and be very happy.”

Again the child asked,
“And how am I going to be able to understand when
people talk to me if I don't know the language?”

God said,
“Your angel will tell you the most beautiful and sweet
words you will ever hear, and with much patience
and care, your angel will teach you how to speak.”

“And what am I going to do when I want to talk to you?”

God said,
“Your angel will place your hands together
and will teach you how to pray.”

“Who will protect me?”

God said,
“Your angel will defend you even if it means risking it's life.”

“But I will always be sad because I will not see you anymore.”

God said,
“Your angel will always talk to you about me and
will teach you the way to come back to me,
even though I will always be next to you.”

At that moment there was much peace in heaven, but
voices from Earth could be heard and the child hurriedly asked,
“God, if I am to leave now, please tell me my angel's name.”

“You will simply call her
‘Mom.’”

My life verse

2004-11-29T14:40:00.000-08:00

"At one time we too were foolish, disobedient, deceived and enslaved by all kinds of passions and pleasures. We lived in malice and envy, being hated and hating one another. But when the kindness and love of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of righteous things we had done, but because of his mercy. He saved us through the washing of rebirth and renewal by the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us generously through Jesus Christ our Savior, so that, having been justified by his grace, we might become heirs having the hope of eternal life."

--Titus 3:3-7

My personal statement of faith

2004-11-20T15:17:00.000-08:00

My faith irritates. I will defend it to the death.
My faith offends. I will still defend it to the death.
My faith is not kind to all. I will continue to defend it to the death.
My faith stands against the ways of the world. I will always defend it to the death.

My faith is not subject to the whims of those who are of the world. Yes, it is offensive. Yes, it is difficult to take. Such is the Word. It goes against everything of the world: greed, lust, selfishness, pride - all the sins of the world. I will not betray my Lord and Savior to please those who are offended by my beliefs. I will not let the words of those ruled by the world sway my beliefs. I do not care if they do not respect me, or even hate me because of that. Such things are temporary and not of God. I will not spare them the truth of the Bible to spare their feelings. Too many have done so before me and I fear they will discover the truth too little too late. I will not be counted among them in the end.

In the Bible, God is quite clear about what sin is. It is unfortunate that many, because of Man's willfully sinful nature, try to use the Word itself to excuse their sins. They misinterpret, misrepresent, or just plan ignore any passages that they disagree with. They may fool people that way, but they do not fool God.

Welcome to the REAL Jesusland blog

2004-11-16T07:37:00.000-08:00

Unlike that other blog, I won't denegrate people based upon their religious beliefs (or lack thereof) or where they live.